i grow from special seed

exactly 9 months ago i was sure i was entering into a banner year. better job, better pay...life was going pretty well. then as usual things come crashing down. my dad is gone, my job is gone and it's an effort to string second to second together. the job in guildford was rescinded and they won't tell me why. i have no income and increasingly dwindling prospects. the progression of years just get worse instead of better.